The Biggest Big Bang

Have you ever woken up and felt incomplete? Have you ever asked yourself, "Why am I here?"

Many of us have. This blog is my attempt to understand the world around me. The goods, the bads, the uglies, and of course, the beautiful. I'm currently a student at a local community college, and an employee at a local animal hospital. I am also a full-time son, and a full-time observer. However, being an observer isn't a job, but instead is a life style. Every day I see events and occurrences that reverberate throughout the lives of those they touch.

My favorite classes are Biology and English. My goal in life is to be a field biologist, but I've only begun that journey. I've got some phenomenal professors. In my eyes, not only do they teach, but they inspire. It's out of this inspiration that I sought to learn more about the subject of a recent lecture, The Big Bang Theory. In my endeavors I came across the video linked within this post. I highly suggest you watch it, even if you don't support the theory, and it is theory. The theory states that nothing existed eons ago. At some moment, a moment outside of time and space, for time and space didn't exist, it happened. An event occurred, the first occurrence ever, that set into motion the world and lives we live today. Out of the nothing came everything. Sub Atomic particles met for the first time and bonded to form atoms and elements, which in turn came together to form compounds and set the stage for the beginning of life. As my biology professor wonderfully stated, "Hydrogen formed and met a few oxygen..." and thus the most important inorganic molecule was formed, H2O. Stay with me, I have a point. My professor went on to tell us all about the different schools of thought, vitalistic/teleological thinking and mechanistic/causalistic thinking. The former is the theory of a creator God, or gods, and His/their role in predestination. This theory says that it did not all happen by chance, that a vital force drove creation and existence with the specific intention of carrying out fate and history as we know it today. The latter theory asserts that it was an inevitability, that it happened because it had to. Chemical, physical, and biological laws and happenings stimulated what happened there after. This theory states that no fate or vital force wrote the histories of existence. We're on our own in a world of hard data. In my mind, both arguments are supportable, falsifiable, and believable. I doubt I will ever understand enough on the matter to choose a side without doubt, but I'd like to think, for my own personal comfort, that we were created by a vital force for a purpose. It helps me sleep, honestly.

Today was difficult. I went to class as scheduled, then proceeded to work. I work two shifts a week at the hospital. I love my job. Not only is the medical environment and professionalism invigorating, but I live for the interactions with the animals. I'm drawn to them for a reason I can't explain. I love them. In this limitless world, we have companions who share our planet. It's a comfort that is valued beyond words.

Nikki came in today. She was sweet, loving, and beautiful despite her sickness. She'd been fighting with medical problems for some time. She was emaciated, dehydrated, and pitiful. One look in hers eyes revealed how much she loved. In some sense, she knew something was wrong. Did she know that her intestinal problems had become too much for her family to manage? No.

I'm getting close to my point.

In this limitless world, in a universe constantly growing, life is ending. If her fate was to die at three years old of a disease she couldn't fight or control, then what is in store for me? Or you? On one side, she was meant to die today. What kind of cruel fate is that? On the other hand, chance brought her to that moment. Random events, chaotic genetic disposition, and statistical probability led her to her end today. Either way her story ends, and either way the universe is at work.

She not only affected her family, but my co-workers and I as well. I know some of us went home and cherished our companions. Her fate was, in part, to affect me.

What's your fate? What is your legacy?

I'll consider myself lucky if I get to see the world and it's beauty. I'll consider myself blessed if I change it for the better. Nikki was beautiful.

I pray, to whoever is listening, that I get the chance to touch lives as she did.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zV6aQbnHSRo


Note: In this blog, a personal, public journal and project geared towards introvertive discovery, I supported the Big Band Theory as fact. This in no way should upset or offend anyone who understands differently. In actuality, the B.B. Theory and various religions do have a strong sense of incongruity, but they are both connected by the fact that they are both theory. Apologies to those who are offended.